Category Archives: Angry Rants

My personal rants over idiotic, dumb and stupid decisions made by others. Or myself.
May (or most likely will) contain lots of swearing, the F words and all the other words not appropriate for little children.
You’ve been warned (not that anyone cares lol)!

Battlefield: Hardline and the story of: “Can I play one game that’s not fucking broken?”

Like, fucking seriously? This is 4th game that I dragged out of my backlog that’s a fucking broken clusterfuck.

First one being just starting this stupid game. Click the shortcut and it opens fucking browser. Then you click PLAY and it goes on next page. And you click PLAY again and game finally starts running. Gotta love EA and their dumb Battlelog. How about just starting the damn game directly without stupid browser?

I also just love games that allow you to bind own keys, but show hardcoded in-game keys as “hints” when playing. Like for example arresting people in Hardline. Apparently “Melee” key is for making arrests and it’s bind to “F” by default. I have it bind to “Mouse Wheel Down”. But when I approach the suspects that I need to arrest, game displays “F” in a square. I’ve seen this in games before and it’s fucking stupid. Especially when you have a fuck ton of special dedicated keys and then you’re digging through settings just to see what the fuck you actually have bind to that action.  Idiotic.

The next gem is FOV slider that literally does nothing. When setting up the game I moved it to 110 which is what I usually use for FPS games and when playing, everything felt so awkwardly in-my-face. Moved slider to 120 and still the same. Then I stood in front of objects to see if it actually changes when adjusted. And the in-game image stayed the same… Come the fuck on EA, you manage to add a FOV slider, but then it does fucking nothing. O_o

As cherry on top, the game runs at locked 144fps, but when I was driving around in the “cut scene”, game feels all choppy and mouse look sluggish as fuck like it’s running at locked 30fps. I check my monitor refresh on its OSD and it says it’s 144Hz (which means 144fps because of FreeSync). This dumbass game somehow runs at 144fps, but actually samples animations at 30fps. How?! How the fuck can you go out of your way to design such a stupid shit EA? How? I’ve actually never seen such a dumb thing in any game to this date. They either ran at locked 30fps, but I’ve never seen one that runs at 144fps but feels like 30fps because that’s what’s actually being rendered at.

All this before I actually started playing the fucking thing properly. Fucking hell. Now I don’t know if I should continue torturing myself or just uninstall this pile of shit…

Call of Duty: Infinite Warfare movement with arrow keys is fucked up

Now I’m starting to notice a trend with something… It’s games I unknowingly kept in my backlog for years. Max Payne 3, Alpha Protocol, Call of Duty: Infinite Warfare… coz when gaming gods fuck me in the ass, they really go full force.

After I lost interest in Alpha Protocol because of stupid broken hacking “mini game” well knowing it’ll be this jarring trash experience every time I’ll have to hack any system, I dropped it and picked up Call of Duty: Infinite Warfare that was still waiting in my backlog. I mean, how can one fuck up CoD right? Well, they managed to do just that…

I’m old school gamer, back when we played games with arrow keys. And it stuck with me. I don’t like bunch of keys crowded underneath my fingers and arrow keys with surrounding keys with just enough space around provide comfort gaming for my big hands. Been doing just fine for almost 3 decades with some issues here and there. But I really haven’t had them for quite a while and certainly not in AAA games. Usually some indie games or from some B studios that had poor QA or whatever.

Well, started playing Infinite Warfare and I noticed how weird movement is. It’s like keys have a 500 millisecond pause in some cases, especially when trying to move diagonally with forward and left/right pressed at the same time. It’s really awkward and clumsy, like the legs aren’t connected to your body correctly or something. It’s really bad. So I searched online and apparently this is a known thing. Well, it was when game was released and apparently, nothing has changed in 2021.

Tried using WASD and behold, disconnected legs are not a thing anymore. Set back arrow keys and legs are behaving like they are all twisted and tangled up again. What the fuck? How can one fuck up a game in a way that actions you can bind to any key don’t behave the same depending on keys you use? WHAAAAAAAAAT? And to make matter worse, not fucking fix it at all?

EDIT:

Well, in the end I made a fix for a fuckup Infinity Ward couldn’t be bothered to fix.

DOWNLOAD

CODIW Arrow Keys Fix

Alpha Protocol’s hacking is the most retarded thing I’ve seen in any game

From Max Payne 3’s roller coaster of retardation, here comes Alpha Protocol. What started as pretty interesting almost Deus Ex experience, quickly turned into a fucking rage fest on first hacking attempt.

Seriously, what absolute moron designed this shit? I don’t mind puzzles and I’ve seen many through years, but this one, this one is just pure distilled retardation.

A screen of flying numbers and letters and you need to spot some that don’t move and place them there. The one you move with keyboard is sort of a non issue as you can quickly tap it across with directional keys and confirm it, the issue with it is because some dumb twat thought controlling the second code with god damn mouse was a great idea. Not only the code isn’t under mouse cursor so you could quickly move it around and place it where you want it, no the fucking thing moves across the field like a slug that’s in no fucking hurry, with massive delay and it’s so wonky and inaccurate that before I move that shit to the right place, the code gets re-positioned already and I’m suppose to move this craptastic slow shit elsewhere? WHAT. THE. FUCK? Trying this dumb crap for like 10 attempts and I just can’t hack this dumb fuckery because it’s so impossibly clumsy.

Why couldn’t this dumb shit just be entirely controlled by keyboard? Move on, confirm it and then continue with second one. Or was this meant to be done simultaneously with both “controllers” or something? By who? Fucking cross eyed Flash Gordon who can go so fast to stop literal time? Or just two segments of keyboard, WASD and NUMPAD or something. Anything but this nonsense.

I was already excited I uncovered an old gem that was stuck in my Steam backlog for years just to have the experience totally fucked up with one simple “minigame”. Some say it’s much easier with a gamepad, but fuck me, I’m not playing this thing with no gamepad. God damn it.

Max Payne 3 is a max pain to play

So, 9 years after its release and I finally managed to fire this thing up and finish the trilogy once and for all. Just to be monumentally disappointed by the game. It’s so bad I don’t even know where to begin…

Controls are just straight out moronic with unnecessarily over-complicated movement controls. Who the fuck thought having all these separate actions for crouching, rolling, vaulting while simultaneously merging Jump action to a vault for no god damn reason, stupid cover mechanics with yet another key, idiotic weapons handling with forced two handed weapon feeling like an afterthought, totally meaningless dual gun selection to forced and idiotic “last kill save” where killing someone in special Bullet Time automatically uses Painkillers for some reason. And then just decides to lay around on the ground. Like, come on!?!??!?!?

To further make matters worse they give you some sort of achievements by collecting clues and golden gun pieces just for game to constantly push you around through cut scenes, so you don’t even have time or chance to explore. The biggest nonsense that happened to me so far was that bar flashback scene where I went on exploring, notice a golden piece up above in room with pool table and suddenly my “buddy” gets shot in the face to death and game ends. Next reload I decide to kill the gringos so they don’t shoot him in the face again and return back for the piece. Nope, the doors behind me get locked for no reason preventing me to go back and pick up that golden gun piece I wanted before. Fuck me.

Entire combat is just so lame and forced it feels worse than Virtua Cop from 24 years ago. Every step through a door is a fucking cut scene and after every such fucking cut scene is a gun fight. And in every such gun fight, when it begins, you’re not holding the gun you were actually holding before that. When in cover, the microscopic dot crosshair is not visible so every time you lift yourself from the cover it takes half an hour before stupid crosshair appears so you’re waving around like an idiot trying to even figure out where you’re pointing at and aim at bad guys like a drunk cop on drugs with pencil stuck in your eye. What absolute moron designed this game!? It’s fucking terrible.

Now I need to drag myself through this trainwreck just to finish it and be done with it forever. It really shows it wasn’t done by Remedy Entertainment and it’s a disgrace for the franchise. What I don’t understand is how Rockstar Games managed to fuck it up so badly…

GSM Arena’s comment section is a cancerous clusterfuck

Boy I’ve never seen such cancerous clusterfuck of a comment section as on GSM Arena. I like their page because it’s a massive resource for smartphones and I like talking about phones and tech in them, but my god the comment section there is a fucking retardation consisting of brain dead morons who are praising their stupid Android phone brands like the biggest fucking die hard fanboys and relentlessly shit on anything Apple frigging non stop, to a point you can’t even have any kind of conversation. You think Apple fanboys are bad? Sure. But wait till you see all those same 5 motherfuckers on GSM Arena who praise everything Android, like worst fucking cultists you can imagine. And if you at any point disagree with these degenerate retards by actually replying to them calling them on their bullshit, they’ll relentlessly attack and harass you in totally unrelated topics with their brain dead replies and comments just repeating same shit over and over and constantly dumping it on your notifications by replying to you by actively chasing your comments everywhere.

And while some would say “well, just ignore them”.  Frankly, that doesn’t really help as in the eyes of observers make those idiots look like they are the all knowing (even though they are stupid as fuck) and you just always end up looking “speechless” if you don’t reply. Sorry, but I fucking hate that.

Partial problem to that is GSM Arena’s limited control over comments. If one could just block those idiots from entirely replying to your comments and hiding their garbage comments entirely and problem would be solved, but they just don’t offer controls for that. The other problem is their allowing of “Anonymous” accounts. These fuckers just use these to harass registered users coz apparently mods can’t even do anything about them. Or something. Can’t explain any other way how exact same “Anons” keep harassing people without getting kicked off the page for good. Third problem is how their moderators “fix” things. It seems they like to punish everyone but those same retards who harass everyone on their page. Why, I have no clue.

Seriously people running GSM Arena, you have a great page, but your way of running “community” is absolutely broken and having those retards chasing and harassing people around makes it a fucking chore to use or just stay around.

This car installments payment bullshit should be banned by law

This is going to be a more localized rant, but I’m guessing this bullshit follows you all in your countries as well. What I’m talking is how we’re bombarded with endless ads for cars with all these insanely low advertised installments payment options that even a student could easily pay off based on what they are advertising. I mean, here’s an example I quickly found…

I mean, look at this amazing deal. Renault Clio E-Tech for 155€ a month! And Renault Zoe for only 179€ a month! No deposit required! Wow, what a bargain! I’m gonna take both!

And while I know Renault has some bullshit battery leasing, I’ve seen the same for VW ID.3 when it was launched and was advertised for like 280€ a month or something like that. VW doesn’t have battery leasing. Anyway, when you do the math, you quickly notice these advertised numbers are just pure Fumier de cheval (horse shit).

Largest number of installments I’ve ever seen was 84 which makes it 7 years. That Zoe for 179€ a month for 7 years adds up to 15.036€. Cheapest, most basic advertised Zoe is 32.840€. Since there is no deposit required as they say, where does the remaining difference come from?

And same for that VW ID.3 for 280€ a month, again without any deposit. 280€ times 84 is 23.520€. Cheapest, most basic ID.3 is advertised at 38.800€. If there is no initial deposit done, where does the remaining difference come from?

Oh right, it comes in the end when they ask you to pay the remaining 20k. Dafuck is this shit?

This is just straight up false advertising and I might not be versed in trade laws enough, but should we really be for such straight up bullshit advertisement to be banned? Don’t fucking advertise it as 179€ a month when it clearly isn’t anywhere close to that and is actually more like 462€ a month. Totally an “insignificant” difference, right? And that’s just raw cost without any extra fees when buying a car with lease. Or even a regular installments payment. In fact, even when deposit is required, claiming these tiny installments and then hiding deposit under that fucking asterisk should be banned. It’s just so incredibly stupid and serves no fucking purpose.

Imagine if I was advertising you could buy a car for a cost of a coffee a month! And then demand a 40.000€ deposit under a microscopic asterisk. I mean, based on how things are advertised, you apparently totally could. Except it’s total BS and misleading on so many levels it’s not even funny. Just tell it’s 462€ a month for fucks sake. I just don’t get it who are they fooling. Or do they want to turn around people who come to buy one and clearly can’t pay that or something? What’s the purpose of that? And I damn well know there are people who see these numbers and think they actually mean a thing they say.

Now I’m gonna sell my RTX 3080 to someone for amazing 10€/month*

*Payment in 84 installments with 2500€ deposit and 500% monthly fee.

Dead Space 3 auto-save system is a pathetic trash designed by a moron

After years (8 years to be exact) of letting Dead Space 3 sit there in the backlog, I finally started playing it. And I want to know who was the motherfucker who designed this shit ass fucking garbage auto-save system in this game? The game is actually pretty decent after I slammed some ray tracing on it and fixed moronic narrow FOV, but my god, the saving is so stupid I think I’m gonna kill myself.

Yesterday I was playing that planet side complex right after I got the Arctic rig suit. The one where you get the access card in the basement with those creepy skinny cannibal creatures and then need to backtrack a bit. I’ve played it for really long, upgraded stuff, harvested resources with bots and progressed really far into the complex. But it was 1 in the morning so I “Save and quit” the game. Today I return to it and this motherfucking dumbass game last saved on the exit from the other building where I picked the Artic suit in the basement. Fucking shit didn’t even save when I entered the complex you had to backtrack to. And it didn’t save at ANY point through that complex and I had like 10 huge creature encounters and did bunch of stuff. Not only that, it saved at the moment when 3 monsters jump me right after it loads. Fuck you EA. Don’t call a button “Save and exit” when it fucking doesn’t save a damn thing. WHAT THE SERIOUS FUCK!? This is why everyone hates stupid auto save systems, because in 99% of the time they all suck ass. I rather be manually quick saving every fucking minute than being set back so far that you lose all interest to even play it again. It says it saves the inventory. Yeah ok, who gives a shit, I need to go through kilometers of some level because your fucking saving is retarded. Fuck me. I had to get this out of my system…

ASUS, your BIOS fan controls are atrocious

Till very recently when I upgraded to AMD Ryzen 5800X with ASUS Strix X570-E Gaming, I was running Intel based system with MSI X99A Gaming 7 motherboard. And it had one of the best BIOS-es I’ve used in decades. Especially fan controls are nothing short of spectacular. Fan control separated into CPU and SYSTEM sensors, meaning you can set fans to ramp up through a defined fan curve based on CPU temperature or SYSTEM temperature for each individual fan. What this means is that you can set CPU fan to react based on CPU temperature where chassis (case) fans can react based on SYSTEM temperature. Which usually fluctuates way less and remains high for longer after heavy workloads. Benefits of this is that chassis fans can follow entirely different fan curve, react to heat inside chassis instead of CPU and when workload is done, fans remain running at elevated speed and slowly go down as chassis internals fully cooling the inside of chassis. Not only such behavior is much more pleasant on ears, it also cools internals more steadily instead of leaving them scorching hot as it instantaneous cuts fan speeds. On top of that, MSI uses slower reacting hysteresis on ALL fan headers which dramatically improves noise perception as fans ramp up gradually as well as slow down gradually and not react to temperature changes instantaneously, making fan acoustic profile much less erratic and noticeable where ASUS is the exact opposite of that unfortunately.

Now that I’ve described how MSI does fan control in their BIOS, lets turn our attention to ASUS and their ASUS Strix X570-E Gaming motherboard. It’s one of better if not one of the best motherboards when it comes to VRM design and it’s made to really push Ryzen CPU’s to their limits, including Ryzen 5950X powerhouse with 16 cores and 32 threads.

What really bothers me about this board is how poor fan control is. The general pre-defined Standard, Silent, Turbo and Full Speed profiles sort of work and are easy way for casual users to set fans. It’s quiet in idle and ramps them up under load. Problem with this is, it’s just so absurdly basic it makes it bad. And that’s on a motherboard that costs over 300€. THREE HUNDRED EUROS!

Only temperature sensor that can be used for fans is CPU temperature. Which, despite of using Artic Cooling Liquid Freezer II 240mm, tends to jump quickly under heavy load. And no matter how I adjust the curve, fan speed is jumping up and down like stupid, causing fans to ramp up to high speed (and high noise) for a second or two, maybe up to five after burst loads and then instantly drop down. There seems to be no fan speed hysteresis involved. If you change fan speed, it does that instantaneously. And it does the same when it’s following fan curve based on CPU temperature. For both, CPU fans and also all chassis fans. I’m just playing Shadow of Tomb Raider with everything cranked to 11 and it keeps occasionally ramping up fans instantaneously during gameplay. And my god it’s so incredibly annoying. Starting Windows after restart? Fans ramping up and down like mad. Starting browser? Fans ramping up and down. It’s absurd. And same for chassis fans. The moment CPU load is gone, chassis fans go down to minimum RPM and then it takes forever for air and components inside chassis to cool down. I just don’t get it why ASUS has BIOS fan controls on such sad and basic design level. Hell, motherboard has bunch of temperature sensors and you can’t use ANY of them to control fans based on that. Fan hysteresis. None. Something is telling me the fan controls are no better on 700€ boards from ASUS either. Where MSI had all that on a relatively affordable Gaming 7 board. And checking their latest BIOS versions, they even gave users hysteresis controls for fans. On X99A Gaming 7 it was there as a fixed feature that always worked the same. New MSI boards have ramp up and slow down hysteresis controls. So you can make fans operate the way YOU want it and you can do it in total control. You can make them ramp up and down slowly. You can make them ramp up quickly and then creep down slowly. Or make them ramp up slowly and slow down quickly. And what ASUS does? Nothing of this. It just knocks fan RPM around instantaneously like it’s 1999… It’s pathetic and sad how little they’ve done to this feature. I had 2 ASUS boards through years, ASUS P5Q Deluxe and ASUS X99 TUF and they’ve literally done NOTHING to the fan control since back then. Where MSI pushed it to a whole new high with full hysteresis controls on top of what they offered before.

Oh and I forgot to mention how difficult it is to create a perfect fan curve when mouse lags around with half a second delay for some stupid reason (same mouse on same monitor didn’t on MSI’s X99 board) and how moving fan curve control points also moves adjacent fan curve control points when you go below or above adjacent control points level. ASUS, why are you doing this? It’s not saving time or being useful, it’s straight up annoying! If I move a control point in the middle of curve down, it should stop at the lowest adjacent control point and not push that one lower too. It’s just so bizarre and hard to control. And same when going up. It’ll move the adjacent fan control point higher instead of stopping the current one until you move the adjacent one higher. It would just be so much better if it behaved like that instead of how it does  now.

It’s unlikely anyone at ASUS would even care what I say, but just maybe by some weird chance, someone will read this and actually take care of it, hopefully on existing still relevant boards like X570 ones for Ryzen and not sometime in very distant future…

  • Add option to control fans based on CPU temperature or SYSTEM temperature and not just CPU temperature
  • Add option to designate CPU or SYSTEM sensor for ANY fan header on motherboard
  • Add option to adjust fan hysteresis for ramping up as well as spinning down individually (for every individual fan header)
  •  When moving fan curve points, do NOT allow moving of adjacent curve points when going below or above their level with the currently controlled control point.

I hope it’s understandable enough. If ASUS added this stuff to their Q-Fan, it would be amazing. But it just isn’t anywhere close to that with current Q-Fan fan control panel. And no, I don’t want to use Windows software to control fans. I want cooling control to be baked into motherboard, so it always behaves as expected regardless of what OS I’m running or what I’m doing with the system.

It’s also weird that out of all people using ASUS boards, I seem to be the only one complaining about it. Do people care so little about their acoustic profile of the system or they haven’t ever used any MSI’s motherboard to see how absolutely superior their fan controls are?

ASUS, you seriously need to address this and make it better. Far better than it is currently. If you want me to ever consider ASUS boards again. Coz if you don’t, I surely won’t. It’s that bad.

Movie “Breach” is the weirdest thing I’ve seen in decades

Recently stumbled upon a movie called “Breach”. And since it was about space ship and weird shit happening on it, I was immediately interested. Then realized Bruce Willis and Thomas Jane are in it and it’s a recent movie from 2020. I was like whaaaaaat, how did this thing fly under my radar?! How nobody talked about it anywhere?

Only other movie giving me wtf vibes after watching it was Uwe Boll’s House of the Dead where I literally dreamed about it and had mild nightmares. Like, by just how little sense it made as whole and that haunted me in my dreams that night after watching it. And Breach is on that very same level. It’s actually really difficult to put it all together…

It’s like the authors of this movie got inspired by bunch of cool sci-fi games and movies like System Shock 2, Doom, Aliens (both originals and Prometheus), Stargate- SG1, Dead Space and then just somehow executed it really poorly with really dumb and inconsistent plot, cheesy dialogues, really weird interactions with characters, really weird combat scenes, really weird aliens, really weird ship structure, really weird faster than light travel, really weird ship reactor, really weird… well, it’s a really weird movie with even dumber and weirder final scene.

And there is just something that just can’t escape my head. How the hell Bruce Willis and Thomas Jane ended up in this movie?! How can one make such a weird low budget, low effort movie and get these two actors on board unironically.

I know people often mock Nicolas Cage for crappy movies that don’t even hit theaters, but my god I cannot understand this one. Did I mention it has Bruce Willis in it?

I’m starting to believe this movie was actually a plot by Bruce Willis and Thomas Jane to troll everyone in this god forsaken year of 2020. It was like their “fuck you everyone” gig and I hope they had fun doing it and even more fun laughing at us idiots who watched it. Coz my god I haven’t watched anything this dumb and bad in decades. Not years, decades! If you want a lethal dose of cringe, then by all means, watch it!

Brave, fuck your browser and fuck your feelings

Just don’t bother with Brave browser. People making it are incompetent, being unable to fix broken shit for months and can’t give any feedback to their users so you have to wait and ask about everything like an idiot. And people running their community forum are somehow even worse. Not only the forum is managed like absolute ass, they have the fucking worst word censoring system in place. Fucking single word blocking. Have you written “hell”, “wtf” or stupid/dumb anywhere in the post? Yeah, well, dumb forum will show you a popup that you just used the “no no” word and prevent you from posting it until you remove it. Who the fuck gets offended by “why the hell” in a post? Or “wtf”? Yeah, they literally banned “wtf”. You can’t use it. Or “this is a really stupid problem” because “stupid” is in it? Context fucking matters you absolute retards, you can’t just fucking ban individual words and entirely ignoring context. It makes you look like fucking offended moronic snowflakes. And then you go on and fucking ban me till next year coz you get all offended by my rant about your shitty ass word banning filter that makes writing anything a fucking chore (and I was fucking tame there, not like here on my blog) and your retarded forum is so wonderful I can’t even delete my profile until ban expires as it doesn’t allow you to login at all. Who uses such stupid ass forum software for fucks sake? It fucking stinks. And stop being so fucking offended you need to ban individual words. Who fucking does this? I’ve not seen anything this retarded anywhere. Fuck.